My Secret Love
by amazingbliss
Summary: Cagalli's POV. High School life. Don't you love it? I don't. Problem number 1: I have a crush on this guy. No. 2: He doesn't know i exist. Problem 3? Simply put, He's the jock and I, the Loser. The type who never gets the happy ending. Until now... ACxKL
1. Prolouge

**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed (Destiny)**

**A/N: Hope you enjoy this fic (: everything here is in Cagalli's POV

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He smiled at me today.

Ok, fine, that was an exaggeration; he smiled in my direction because Meiryn was behind me. But still, for a moment there, my heart melted and I felt like I was on cloud nine!

His striking emerald eyes pierced through my heart (more like, sliced and diced my heart into a million pieces). His midnight blue hair, I noticed, was freshly cut and plastered messily across his perfect features.

Today he was wearing a collared shirt (two buttons were left undone, showing off his nicely tanned chest) and army berms.

He was the hottest, most popular and smartest jock in Seed High. And it just so happens that I am hopelessly in love with him. Ever heard of unreachable love? Here it was.

Me, Cagalli Yula Athha, classic social reject.

Him, Athrun Zala, classic popular, rich jock.

In case you're wondering, relationships like those do not exist.

Aside from that whole smiling incident, nothing unusual happened today. Just the usual: Fllay and Mia tripping me when I have something "spillable" in my hands, Shinn and Rey spitting spitballs at me during Geography and having pieces of papers with the words "poor boy" stuck on my back (they wouldn't even bother to put _tom_boy, just boy. They would never know how much that hurt). Like I said, nothing unusual, nothing abnormal, just another day in school.

Do I cry? No, not anymore.

I've already wasted enough tears on guys who ridicule me and say they can't love a girl who has "lost touch with her feminism" or a poor orphan found off the streets of Orb. I've got no more tears to waste on my classmates' rude comments. In ten years, when I start working, they wouldn't matter.

No more crying, but I don't have anyone to wipe them tears from my face, no one to wash my tear-stained pillow, no one to love. I didn't want to love.

But this was different. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't stop this schoolgirl crush. Buried somewhere in my heart, I knew it was because this was love. It wasn't only his million-dollar smile that turned me on. Nor is it the way he'd surprise Meiryn with Valentine's Day cookies, or the way he swiped the rugby ball from the opponents. It was the way he smiled _in my direction. _

Simply put, it was him. I admit it: the Cagalli who was/is rumored to have an ice-cold heart admits that Athrun Zala, rich, popular jock, turns me on. There, I said it. Happy?

I know he would never love me back, but hey, a girl can dream. Besides, I can wait. I will wait.

**Things to do: **

1. Pass History

2. Do Trig pg 43-45

3. Find out why freezing and melting points are affected by pressure

4. Get him to notice me

5. Get groceries to restock the fridge at the orphanage

**Things not to do:**

1. Fail History

2. Kill Mia and Fllay

3. Kill Shinn and Rey

4. Embarrass myself in front of him

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**A/N: Please drop a review to tell me if i should continue this. Thank you (: **


	2. I LOVE MIA!

**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed (Destiny)**

**A/N: THANK YOU TO ALL THE REVIEWERS! i'm so happy! 24 reviews for one chappie! yayy Oh yes, silver tear said that i should put the story in Athrun's POV too. i might try that in later chappies but don't blame me if it doesn't really work out... Not too good at writing in guy's POV... **

**Anyway ther****eviewers are : Azalaea, naru-chan1, MXC - the show- rocks my socks, Eternally Asuka, asga, shadOwcLife, HentaiNoBakaChick57, Craze Izumi, Mystical Dreamz, thousandbirds, Dinkus, Songstress of Victory, ovp, MysticalMaiden915, cagalli fan gurl, Feminist1991, Cari, PINKSISA, junon2, Genny-chan, silver tear and all the ANONs **

**I LOVE MY REVIEWERS 3**

**Thanks for all the encouragement, suggestionsand support, hope you enjoy this chappie as much (hopefully more) than the first chappie!**

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I LOVE MIA!

I am not crazy.

EW! I'm not a lesbian. I like Athrun remember?

OH MY GOD! I am so freaking not bi. Damn you're minds are sick!

Ok, ok. Let me explain:

I had just purchased my lunch-mushroom soup and a HUGE chocolate sundae.

It was my splurging day; I usually bring a sandwich to school for lunch but every other Tuesday, I treat myself with the weeks' savings.

I was walking to my table.

I have a table you know-all to myself. It's VERY COOL to have your own table.

Who am I kidding here? sigh I'll admit it, not even the geeks want to be associated with hot-tempered me. Hence, a table for 10, reserved all to me.

I was walking to my personal table. And as I said before, _they trip me each time I have something 'spillable' in my hands._ This was one of those times.

Usually I would have got up and then taken some type of mushy food and slopped it all over Mia. Then when her new esprit blouse was all messed up, I would have given her a kick and a few other things and sent her to the nurse, getting detention while I was at it.

But not this time.

You know how people always say (when they fall) they were expecting rock-solid ground but got caught by some really hot guy? Well, did not happen this time.

BUT! (Don't get all angsty on me; I'm getting to the good part, just gimme a sec.) After I fell on my butt and the hot soup and cold sundae was all over my green tank top, I was cold and hot at the same time (this IS possible). My knight in shining armor (guess who?) came from god knows where and slapped Mia.

For a second there I actually thought he was pissed at her for, you know, tripping me. But, yeah, I know, keep dreaming Cagalli! It turns out that Mia told Meiryn that Athrun slept with Fllay and Meiryn was so angry that she broke up with Athrun.

Anyway, I was still happy 'cause after that he talked to me. Not like the usual way he talks to me, which is talking to like the whole student population or the whole class, but one-on-one.

His first three words he said to me were, "Are you ok?" I know, I know, the other three words would have been so much more romantic but hey, I don't think he knew I existed until now.

Then he bent down and helped me up.

Tips on not having a heart attack when you go face-to-face with your crush:

1. Do NOT stare his dazzling emerald eyes.

2. Do NOT look at his chest (this applies to when you're a guy too) or his abs.

3. Do NOT look at his lips and think he's going to kiss you.

He grabbed a tissue and brushed it over my face wiping off the ice-cream cum mushroom soup that was smeared all over me.

Second thing he said to me: "I'm Athrun."

In my head I said, "Like I didn't know, everyone here in Seed High knows that you're the hottest guy in school (possibly in the entire world) and I'm hopelessly in love with you."

But, I played dumb. Trust me on this, you do NOT want guys to think that everyone knows them; it boosts their already bloated ego by way too much.

So I was all cool. Like, "Hey, Athrun. Cagalli here." And I did NOT stutter.

HE SHOOK MY HAND! I do not feel like washing it. You know, keep some of him with me…

Oh wells.

Best part right here: He lent me his Jacket.

After he was done wiping away as much ick as he could from my face and blouse, (no, he did not grope me) he guided me to the washroom and insisted I take off my shirt and wear his Jacket because _he didn't want me to get sick. _Damn, that concerned look on his face played havoc with my already hyperactive heart.

So, I walked into History with Athrun Zala's Jacket on. Let me tell you, this was the first time many people noticed me. I was pleased.

Oh shit. I just thought of something. I'll have to return the Jacket tomorrow.

**Things to do:**

1. Find an excuse not to return Zala's Jacket

2. Find out what exactly happened in History since my head wasn't really awake (thinking of you-know-who)

3. BUY GROCERIES FOR THE ORPHANAGE

**Things not to do:**

1. Return Zala's Jacket

2. Kill Shinn and Rey (NO SPITBALLS IN MY HAIR TODAY!)

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**A/N: Someone reviewed and said that she would like it if imake the chappieslonger so i gave it a shot. I personally think that i suck at long chappies buti dunno what you readers want. longer chappies wit not so much content or short and sweet. Drop me a review tell me which u prefer ok? **


	3. Poem

**A/N: THANKS TO ALL MY REVIEWERS, namely: naru-chan1, cagalli12, lora, harumonia, Anon, Maeye, junon2, The Angels' Princess, MXC - the show - rocks my socks, PINKSISA, pochi, Eternally Asuka, MysticalMadien915, Star-Moon-Angel, Dinkus, AthrunXCagalli4ever, ovp (ps: pls update ur fic too!), panda, Genny-chan, saPphiRe.'.m0i, Kageharu Kaco, -- (Mia and Fllay aren't bad in thisfic, they just aren't nice to Cagalli-will be explained in later chaps), Mystical Dreamz, Sunflower Seeds, Cari-Akira, Azalaea.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed (Destiny)**

**Hope you enjoy thischapp (:

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Call me blind but I never saw it coming:

Seed High is planning an excursion-to an Orphanage.

Orb's Orphanage.

My Orphanage.

My Home.

Just when I thought my life couldn't get worse. But some people do say that it's always the darkest before it turns pitch black. I hope I've reached pitch black 'cause if I haven't I don't think I can stand my life much longer.

Firstly, I flunked my History test-8/30. Ms. Ramius (she looks after all the kids at the orphanage) doesn't know about it yet, if she did, I'm pretty sure I'd be on babysitting duty right now.

Secondly, BLOODY Mr. Fllaga didn't let me into the basketball team because I was a girl. Note: NOT because I wasn't good. Puhh-lease! Sexual discrimination is so last century.

Oh, and I didn't manage to think up a good excuse to keep Zala's Jacket for a few more days so I went to returned it to him during History.

As if that's not bad enough, he didn't remember my name. God, why did my freaking parents who abandoned me leave me such a hard-to-remember crappy name? I would have been happy with Jane, or something.

I approached him calm and collected. Not. My heart was racing as if I just ran 10km. In between my calming ritual, I managed to stutter, "H-hey Zalaa… Here's y-your j-jacket. T-thanks!" I am so glad I didn't squeak. You know how when you're really nervous a squeak just pops out of nowhere? Well, I almost certain I didn't squeak this time. Almost.

Guess what his response was. No guesses? Ok I'll tell you, he tore his eyes away from his book and looked deep into my eyes. (Yeah, he wasn't even looking at me and I was so damn nervous, imagine what it would be like if he actually became my boyfriend.)

He pointed at his Jacket that was draped over my shoulder and said, "You're that girl I lent my Jacket to yesterday right?"

Well DUH! WHY ELSE DO YOU THINK I WOULD HAVE YOUR JACKET? _That girl? _Gosh, he doesn't even remember my name. 'It is not good when he doesn't remember your name…' I thought to myself.

I was so ticked off.

Yesterday I got all happy just because I had a 5-minute one-on-one conversation with him and he doesn't even remember my name. Gee, most girls my age SLAP their boyfriend because he forgot their first-kiss anniversary but here I am just getting slightly annoyed because he doesn't remember my name.

God, I am SUCH a loser.

Anyways, he took back his Jacket with a "no problem" and a "what's your name again?" I was tempted to make up a fake stupid name like I. E. Weiner, but that is NOT what you do to your crush. (Hey, at least I know that much)

So (again with the cool and composed tone) I replied, "Cagalli," giving him a death glare while I was at it. Not even my crush gets away with forgetting my name.

There was only one interesting, not-horrible thing that happened after History today: I found this piece of paper on the ground as I was leaving the class. I know right? SOOOO amazing! rolls eyes

It wasn't blank, though. It was the size of a CD case. One side was covered with messy scribbles and the other had the most beautiful poetry I'd ever read. It totally expressed my feelings about, well, everything. It went like this:

I have no life, I have to friends;

I've got nothing, not even a coin of ten cents.

Flooded by people, who all think they know me;

What is this stereotype? I just want to be me.

I am nothing; I have nothing to care about;

I need a listening ear; I want to tell everything.

Why can't I just tell the people around me?

'Cause we are living on two different worlds.

I can't cry no more, my future is uncertain;

My spirit is broken, what should I do?

Scolding is how you raise me, dad,

Then, just like that, you're gone.

Some people wish for world peace;

I was born into a war, myself a one-man army.

Standing at the crossroads of life, I yell:

How is it possible that you're gone?

There was no name.

I've been thinking about all the people who could have written this but to no avail. So, I've made a list of all the people in my History class:

Athrun :"_you've got nothing; not even a coin of ten cents?" I think not, Mr. rich-boy_

Mia :_ditto_

Fllay :_ditto_

Dearka :_you've got a best friend… how can it be that you've got no friends, no "listening ear"?_

Yzak :_Dearka is your best friend._

Shinn :_you're thoughts aren't that profound_

Rey :_your future is certain... you'll be dead tomorrow because of that extra wet spitball… _

Lunamaria :_ you suck at English, this is definitely not you _**(no offence to fans, i just needed a reason for Luna not to be the poet)**

Meiryn :_ you can't even spell metabolism. _**(same as above)**

Stellar :_well, I heard that she had abusive parents so could it be that that's what the poem meant when it said "scolding is how you raise me"?_

Auel : ---

Sting : ---

Well that's it. That's the list. The people in my class.

I've narrowed it down to the troubled three-Stellar, Auel and Sting. That's what they're called anyway. Rumour has it that it's because they've been in and out of jail and their parents aren't exactly great role-models.

Maybe I'll find a friend after all…

**Things to do:**

1. Find out who wrote the poem

2. Try to get Mr. Cruz to change excursion destination

3. Geo-effects of an Aging Population

4. Think of excuse for failing History, something along the lines of "I couldn't concentrate what with all the spitballs"

5. GET GROCERIES BEFORE THE KIDS AT THE ORPHANGE DIE OF HUNGER

**Things not to do:**

1. Get killed by Ms. Ramius

2. Do not fall for the little kid's cute baby face, especially Mayu's

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**A/N: I knowthe poemdoesn't rhyme or anything but still hoped u liked it. It was my first attempt at writing a poem so i'd be really happy if you dropped a review about it. Thanks (:**

**PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW! **


	4. Transfer Students

**A/N: i'm so sorry! i haven't updated it two weeks. SORRY! PLEASE PLEASE FORGIVE ME! school has been hell. work has been hell. my life has been hell and if not for trousse de coupe's** **review i don't think i would have updated. for those who are wondering, IT WAS A VERY SWEET REVIEW ) go check it out if you wanna i won't wast space putting it here. **

**Thank you to other reviewers who also played a part in persuading lil ole me to update. you guys are : HentaiNoBakaChick57,daisukiasu'n'caga, trousse de coupe, MysticalMaiden915, Azalaea, junon2, Vigorian-Asakura,PINKSISA, cagals, Kandida, AthrunXCagalli4ever **(you just cried? and i made you laugh? well thanks! but if you don't mind me asking, why were you crying? if you need a listening ear i'm here ( )**, tha lil' angel **(yeah it's OOC. can't help it. thanks anyway)**, ovp, harumonia, JC-Athie **(who's to say Athrun hasn't fallen for her? remember you're only getting Cagalli's POV)**, thousandbirds, The Angels' Princess, Panda, MXC - the show- rocks my socks, asga, Lie74, Kageharu Kaco **(hey... you're sharp. keep it shush aiirite?)**, Cari-Akira, Mystical Dreamz, Kazumi Kairi or Kairi-chan, Genny-chan**

**I'm sorry i don't reply personally to all my reviewers, i just reply to those who have questions. so if you want PERSONAL reply's ask me sumthin P getting back...**

**Alot of you guys are really good at this guessing game eh? I bet all you guys are guessing that Ahturn wrote the poem? HEHE i could be mean and say GUESS AGAIN. but i'm not much of a liar. P **

**Thanks for saying my poem was ok for a first try. i still don't think it's good. i might change it if i manage to write a better one. but thanks much(**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed (Destiny)**

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Two new students joined the school today-Kira Yamato and Lacus Clyne.

I think that they are a couple. I say _think_ because they walked into class hand-in-hand and there were some same-colour-lipstick-marks-that-Lacus-was-wearing on Kira's face. I have certain doubts because I think Kira was flirting with me.

First time: when Mr. Fllaga asked Kira to sit with Athrun; and Lacus with me, he plopped himself next to me and forced Lacus to sit with Athrun. Not that she seemed to hate Athrun's company.

Second time: during History, I wasn't exactly paying attention to Mr. Fllaga. And you know the way teachers can ALWAYS tell that you're not listening? Mr. Fllaga should get like a Grammy's for his talent. Anyway, he asked me a question, which I didn't even hear and I was stuck. But, Kira to the rescue! He wrote the answer on a piece of paper and passed it to me. SAVED. It was like the first time I got something right in History.

Third time: After History, Shinn and Rey were filling him in on my situation and that it would be 'social suicide' to talk to me. He slapped Shinn and punched Rey.

They say third time's a charm, but apparently, charm was not what he was going for.

Forth time: for lunch, I had 3 people, sitting at my once withdrawn, isolated, 10-person table. He treated me to ice-cream. When I bluntly refused, he mumbled something about I CARE about your welfare so please, and then he gave me a hurt puppy-dog look. I would never admit it out loud, but puppy-dog looks could get me to do anything.

Tell me if I'm over-reacting or something. I mean, stranger treat me to ice-cream. Of course I like. P but sorry pal, my heart's with Athrun? I do NOT know how to bring the message across.

**Things to do:**

1. GET THE GROCERIES BEFORE THE KIDS AT THE ORPHANGE DIE OF HUNGER. Heh. It seems I do not have to do that since Ms. Murrue took it into her own hands and bought the groceries.

2. Try to get Mr. Fllaga to change the excursion destination

3. Find out if Kira really is flirting with me

4. If he is, tell Kira 'not interested'

**Things not to do:**

1. Go for an excursion to my own home. 'Gee look! That's my toilet. Over here we have Cagalli's ever famous kitchen!'

2. Get Kira to think that I like him flirting with me even though I do

3. Over-react by saying that Kira is flirting with me when he really isn't

4. Embarrass myself in front of my two new friends

stares at list oh god. Help.

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**Well, how was it? Short, i know. But i thought that this was my best chappie so far. I dunno. well as usual this is me beggin for reviews. )**


	5. Excursion

**A/N:HELLO EVERYONE. I BET YOU THOUGHT I WAS DEAD BECAUSE I HAVEN'T UPDATED IN 4 WEEKS. BUT I'M NOT DEAD. HAHA. TRICKED YOU. XD. Sorry, i'm high. Blame it on 3 cans of _nescafe. _Anyway, because i felt so bad about keeping yall hanging for 4 weeks, this chappie is longer. by about 200 words. amzing yeah? Thank you once againg to all my reviewers: azncandyangel, MysticalMaiden915, burnt.icecream, vegetasprincess1, Vigorian-Asakura, Feminist1991, junon2, daisukiasu'n'caga, Cagals, JC-Athie, HentaiNoBakaChick57, The Angels' Princess, Lil' Sugar, The Jackle, Kazumi Kairi or Kairi-chan, IYGU, Cari-Akira, Mystical Dreamz, ovp, saPphiRe.'.m0i, PINKSISA. LOVE YOU GUYS. 33 a special thanks to PINKSISA who proof-read this chap. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed (Destiny)

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Despite my never-ending begging, bribing and blackmailing, Mr. Fllaga refused to cancel the trip to the orphanage. So the love of my life got to see my _wonderful _home-the ORPHANAGE, where the roof springs a leak every other day, where the most expensive thing there is the washing machine, where my room is as small as the school toilets. As if my reputation was not bad enough.

But you remember Kira and Lacus, right? Well, they were swell. (heh. Sorry about the rhyme, couldn't resist) Really.

I mean, in school there are three types of people. The popular kids consisting of the rich, the athletic and beautiful; and the ostracised made up of everyone else; the "unknowns" who as the name suggests are practically invisible in school. They don't get pranked like the unpopular kids but they're not exactly included in all their parties.

Clearly, Lacus Clyne (famous singer in Orb) and Kira (son to the Chairman of Orb) belonged to the "popular" category. So why did they:

a) Defend me when everyone else laughed at me?

b) Sit with me when it is obviously social suicide?

c) COMPLIMENT me on my QUAINT living quarters?

Tell me if I'm missing something. This is not an everyday thing.

Anyway, getting back to the excursion. Two of them stuck to me like talking shadows and they refused to take part in the "make-fun-of-the-orphan" game, rather, Kira got pretty uptight and threatened to break Rey's nose again and told Fllay and Mia that he wasn't afraid to hit girls. I didn't hear from them after that.

Kira and Lacus may never ever know how much befriending me meant to me, maybe because I'm not planning to tell them, but that's not the point. For practically my entire life, everyone, except my adopted family, has made fun of me.

Every new haircut would be wrong somehow, even if it looked exactly like Fllay's or Mia's. Every "new" top I got would be out of fashion even if a week later one of the Hawke sisters thought it was the coolest addition to her closet. Everything I did was bad. Until Kira and Lacus came along…

They were like this explosion of light in a place that has never seen light. Though small, I now have a reason to go to school.

Did I mention that Lacus said that my shoes were really nice? Or that yesterday, she got the same wallet as me because she thought it was nice? And now everyone in school has that wallet because all of them are die-hard fans of Lacus Clyne?

Let me tell you, if you've never experienced it, that knowing you've started a trend feels GREAT. As my adopted brother (Heine) at the orphanage says "it's better than sex". BUT, I wouldn't know that, I'm not that kind of girl. I'm NOT.

In any case, a really queer thing happened at the orphanage: It turns out that Mayu (the little girl whose puppy-dog eyes I can't resist) is Shinn's sister. But, Mayu refuses to accept Shinn as her elder brother saying that I am her only sibling because I was the only one with her when she was scared of all the monsters in her closet, or when the doctor had to give her an injection.

I must say, I was flattered.

So, because Shinn wants to get his sister to like him again, he started to talk to me. To find out what she likes so that the next time he visits he can bring it along. To find out what her hobbies are so that he can play with her the next time he comes. To find out what she likes talking about… etc.

(FYI: Shinn was adopted when his parents died in a car crash and Mayu supposedly went missing. Mayu suffered from memory-loss during the accident and the doctors were unable to I.D. her so they put her at the orphanage. Shinn can get his adopted parents to adopt Mayu as well, but he doesn't want to force her into an environment he very clearly knows she will hate. So he's trying to win her affection back so that she'll be happy when she starts to live with him and his adopted parents.)

Adds another to the "talking shadow" list. Well, it seems that the excursion wasn't half bad. Although it's for an ulterior motive, I now have 3 people who talk to me in school, 2 people who defend me against derision and 1 person who treats me to ice-cream.

I could get used to this.

**Things to do:**

1. Get Shinn to do my Algebra in exchange for telling Mayu nice, fluffy stories about Shinn

2. Remember to slap Heine for thinking perverted thoughts

3. Stop thinking about Athrun because he's never going to notice me

**Things not to do:**

1. Fall asleep in Math and History on the same day

2. Blow my chances of being friends with Kira and Lacus

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**A/N: I dunno how this chap is because as i've said before, i'm not too good with longer chaps. and some bits of what i wrote here is how i feel sometimes in school. so like it would be nice to hear that all that suffering can be put to good use. Thanks for any reviews... **


	6. My past, my present

**A/N: Seriously, i think i'm losing my spark. This chapter isn't funny. It's just odd. I know the past few chapters haven't been too good but that's because i'm building up the storyline. But i was actually trying to be funny this chapter. I'm losing it! ARGH. Anyways, I'm sorry about this chapter, you won't really like it. But let me just remind you that this IS A CAGALLI AND ATHRUN FIC. I just did something stupid in here to get the angst up. Heh. Once again, a huge THANK YOU to all my darling reviewers: cagalli12, junon2, KaiKaiCutie, Angelsorceress, SacredBlade, mohxo, Mystical Dreamz, Kazumi Kairi or Kairi-chan, HentaiNoBakaChick57, daisukiasu'n'caga, The Jackle, kate, IYGU, Cari-Akira, Vigorian-Asakura, saPphiRe.'.m0i, PINKSISA. I LOVEYOU GUYS. A special shoutout to junon2, PINKSISA, Mystical Dreamz, Kairi or Kairi-chan, HentaiNoBakaChick57, daisukiasu'n'caga, IYGU, Cari-Akira and saPphiRe.'.mOi who have been supporting me all the way (or almost all the way). You have little idea how much your reviews mean to me. ( Just wanted to say thank you in case you didn't know how much i appreciate it.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam See (Destiny) heh. i think i forgot to put the disclaimer on the previous chapter. Oh well. i dun think anyone cares. **

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I did a poll.

Out of the entire female population in school, 95 of them love Zala; the other 5 are either not straight or in a relationship. But then again, there are those who are in a relationship but love Zala.

Anyhow, compare that to Shinn's. 5 think he is cute, 75 hate him but hide it, and 29.5 ignore him. I have a category of my own: I'm his girlfriend.

I don't know why I never saw it that way. Love someone who loves you back instead of loving someone who will never notice you. Shinn loves me. He said so. Beggars can't be choosers, right?

I don't exactly know how it happened. He just started hanging around more often, we talked about more things than his sister and then WHAM. We're _accidentally in love. _I'm not saying that my heart doesn't do a little jig every time Zala looks my way, but it's like what he thinks of me doesn't _matter _anymore 'cause now I've already got someone who loves me.

I AM NO LONGER THE TOMBOY. I AM IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH SHINN. IN YOUR FACE MIA!

And like when we walk around in school, I can sense the looks of all the kids in school. They're not the usual _glares._ It is different. It's like

They are smiling as us. Saying _they look great together_ sometimes the occasional jealous look but that's alright. It means I've got something special. Something she wants.

But I don't know if I love him. But I'm sure I love his love for me. I love that he cares for me. I love the-little-presents-he-gives-every-now-and-then. (Think the gorgeous flowers and scrumptious chocolate treats in my locker)

…

Fine, I don't love him.

But I don't know how to put him down nice and easy. No one taught me the 101 on "how to dump a guy in so many words" and no one bothered to tell me how to identify that odd feeling I got when he presented me with a bouquet of flowers and a love testimony, which turned out to be shock not love.

Besides, it's not all bad, it's nice to know that someone cares about you.

Since, apparently, you are not even worth 18 fucking steps. When your parents hated you so much that they just dumped you in a bloody dust-bin to rot and die. (I finally managed to weasel that bit of information from Ms. Murrue. She decided that its time I knew where I came from.) Well, gee, thanks for letting me know that I was found in a friggin _Sears _plastic bag in a bin next to the bloody orphanage. Would it have been so much trouble to drop me at the doorstep or did you think I wasn't even worth those 18 steps to the door?

When your past is something like that, you take love wherever you find it.

You also give it sparingly.

No, I don't love him.

But he can love me.

I don't mind.

**Things to do:**

1. Thank Shinn for the flowers and chocolates. (Yes, i know i'm a lousy girlfriend who never fails to forget to say thank you.)

2. Make a birthday present for Lacus since i can't afford to buy one.

Note to self: Do NOT try to bake. Think about the _rock_ buns.

3. Run 2.4km test in under 12 minutes

4. Pluck up the courage to ask Auel if he was the one who actually wrote the poem. **(A/N: the one in the third chap)**

**Things not to do:**

1. Be dumped

2. Cry when/if dumped

3. Fall in love the person who wrote the poem, who must be able to understand me completely by writing that...

4. Get my mind polluted by Heine

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**A/N: My authors ego is going way down because i've been getting lesser and lesser reviews. But for some weird reason, i was compelled to update ASAP instead of waiting for 25 reviews. Oh wells. I hope i get more reviews this chapter to make up for it (HINT HINT) **

**amazingbliss ****xoxxo **


	7. Prom

**A/N: I know you guys hate me. I'm sorry. Even work + going for holidays + trainings everyday doesn't mean i can _not_ update for barely under 2 months. (Please note the sarcasm). On a more serious note, i'm really really really really sorry.I didn't think i wouldn't update for solong.I had this chappie in my comp for about a week, but i was waiting for my dearestfirst-reviewer for the first few chappiesto come online toproof-read it first.But i didn't manage to get her.So i decided(after a week of waiting) to just post this.YOU KNOW I LOVE YOU : lalala, Azalaea, G.S. lover, junon2, Dreams of Eternity, The Jackle, Vigorian-Asakura, cagalli, Childish Hentai, saPphiRe.'.m0i, PINKSISA, CaptKuchiki, AthrunXCagalli4ever, Angelsorceress, SacredBlade, windtear, Natalie, Hell's Fox Princess, ning, Cari-Akira, Kitty-Kat90013820, ovp, Kazumi Kairi or Kairi-chan, Living Arrow, Bisquette, KaiKaiCutie, IYGU, Suki, Mystical Dreamz, daisukiasu'n'caga. **

**Disclaimer:i bet ican put nonsense here and no one will notice.) i do not ownGundam Seed (Destiny) and never will.

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**

For the first time in my entire life, I'm going to prom.

Yes, the place where everybody gets drunk and ends up the next day totally wasted.

-It's tonight-

Yes, the event that I used to dream about being invited to by my blue-haired prince charming when I'd stare at the only star you could see from the window of the bedroom I shared with Shiho because the rest of the stars were blocked by the gigantic buildings surrounding the orphanage.

-2 hours to prom-

I can't wait. I'm so excited, and nervous. _What will everyone think of a total social reject going to PROM?_

At least I'm not going alone…

There are always people who go to prom themselves. (think: Fllay/Mia-depending on who got Zala first… etc.) I never managed to pluck up the courage to do that. Although, they all had valid reasons for doing so, the most popular one being: they got dumped the day before and didn't want to waste the hundreds of dollars they spent on their prom dress.

Which reminds me.

HOW CAN I GO TO PROM WITHOUT A DRESS? NOT THAT I WANT TO WEAR A DRESS. I LOOK HORRID IN A DRESS. I'VE GOT NOTHING TO WEAR FOR PROM.

Ok, that settles it. I'm not going. Time to call Shinn and tell him it's over. Do _not_ mention it's because you have nothing to wear for prom. Just say, "it is OVER. I don't love you in that way. Thanks for everything, you're a great friend." Hang up.

Done, easy as pie-except I never knew how to make pie…

So, there I was in my room freaking out about having to call Shinn and tell him I can't go for prom **or** finding something to wear that wasn't a dress (or skirt) and did not require me to be on heels.

Heels and I do not go together. The first time I wore heels; I fell and sprained my ankle. On my second try, the heel part of the shoe somehow managed to detach itself from the rest of my shoe and I had to walk home barefooted. Let's not even go to the third time.

Anyway, I was "panicking for no reason" (as Heine phrased it; I don't know why but he does not curse. He will not say "I just got fucked up", instead, he would say "I just had sex". Don't ask me what the difference is.). Then like the fairy godmother from Cinderella, Ms. Murrue _appeared_ with an emerald green gown and a hand hiding something behind her back.

Sorry, Heine, there is no other way to describe it: It was fucking beautiful.

Let me describe it for you:

The top slanted so that three-quarters of the sleeve dangled off-shoulder while the other sleeve was non-existent. You could see that the skirt wasn't meant to be full-length, rather, it was meant to go halfway up your shin. There was a slit up the skirt that went up to the mid-thigh level, but the best part of the gown was: it was loose enough that you could wear shorts underneath and no one would see.

Like I said: fucking beautiful.

But, as nice as the gown looked, it wasn't meant for me. It was meant for someone pretty. I'm sure it would look great on Lacus.

Although I've never been to prom there's an unspoken rule that every girl knows: If you are not _very_ beautiful, you do not wear a _very_ beautiful dress.

No one can force me to wear that dress.

-1 hour to prom-

I am so not going.

**Things to do:**

Tell Shinn I'm not going prom; or

Find something _else _to wear

Ask Sting if he wrote the poem because Auel said he didn't

Remind Shinn that Mayu said she wants him to be her brother

**Things not to do:**

Go to prom in that dress

Fall in love the person who wrote the poem; _too late…_

Be disappointed when Mayu chooses Shinn (and money) over ME (and the stinking orphanage)

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**A/N: ****i know i don't make sense sometimes so it would be great if you could point it out. so i won't do it again. ( You know you love the chappie. Press that button.**

**amazingbliss xoxxo**


	8. A Good Start

**A/N: I know all of you probably want to kill me right now, but please, refrain. Killing is bad for the soul. I know nothing can make up for the fact that this update is 3 plus plus months overdue, but i hope you'll forgive me in exchange for what i hope is a great chapter which INSPIRES you to review. If not for you guys this fic would have long become non-existant. Thanks for the endless encouragment. Love you: KaGaRi, cocoapuffaddict, lalala, nina, MysticalMaiden915, PINKSISA, lola.anime.luver.molly, kaurama-kasuki, Anime-writer-for-life, Mystical Dreamz, Vigorian-Asakura, IYGU, windtear, AthrunXCagalli4ever, Haruka Mizumi, iamalittleteapot, Pacific Blue, krista, Kazumi Kairi or Kairi-chan, Cari-Akira, Living Arrow, ovp, The Jackle, junon2, Angelsorceress, saPphiRe.'.m0i, SacredBlade**

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REPHRASE: No one _except Shiho _can force me to wear that dress.

How Shiho managed to get me into that dress still remains a mystery. But I'm guessing it is because:

She threatened to tell Shinn that I was going to dump him because I don't want to wear a dress

She was going to announce to the world that I never really liked Shinn, _at all_.

She gave me candy.

She found me formal _no-heels _shoes.

She is _very_ strong.

I must confess: the main reason is probably c). I'm sure you would wear a dress too if you got candy for it. What! Not even for those sticky, chewy _caramel_-coated rich and creamy _chocolate_? Don't tell me you're not drooling right now. I mean, seriously, who can abstain from _chocolate_?

Point is: I'm sort of happy that I came for prom.

I manage to walk to the dance floor gracefully enough to look like I'm actually used to having guys stare at me like I'm a piece of meat. Holding Shinn's hand I hear a few dog howls and cat calls, and in a place where I used to feel like a pariah **(A/N: definition-a group of people from the lowest social class) **I somehow manage to feel good. Then, I realize that one pair of hungry eyes was green, and before I know it, my head is floating.

I don't even realize my body swaying in synchronization with Shinn's _and _(amazingly) with the steady beat of the music. It barely registers in my head that we have changed partners and that I was currently dancing with Sting. I tried to maintain eye contact with my actual date because _supposedly _that was what you did at dances (thinking back, I'm pretty sure he was dancing with Mia). Then, everything all fell apart at the seams.

The tempo upped, the bass took over the comforting melody of the violin, drums yelled in my ears. You could distinctly pick out Lacus' voice leading the band into the chaos of sounds. Bodies turned from swaying like a Viking ship, to grooving like a canoe being tossed about by the restless waves. Partners changed once more, Shinn took Stellar; I got Kira.

Stellar does a twirl, but doesn't stop. Shinn looks fascinated. He reaches out a hand to her back and presses her towards him. She turns faster than anticipated. He presses against her breast. Her eyes widen. A yelp of shock and pain escaped her lips. Heads turn. Shinn smiles and squeezes. He then goes on to leave a trail of kisses from her shoulder blades (conveniently exposed by her bare-back summer-style aquamarine dress) to her mouth.

I haven't even gotten to the worse part yet.

He turns to me and mouths, "It's over."

I want to say that it never started, but my lips can't form the words. I want to say that I hate him, but the air cannot escape my lungs. I want to stop the rage-inspired tears, but all I manage to do it fall to the floor of multicolored lights and cry.

An arm is wrapped around my trembling frame. I don't recall if it was warm or muscular. I didn't think _whose arm is this _or even_ why is whoever doing this_.I didn't think, full stop.

I just turned my body, flung my arms around him/her (let's call him/her Stranger) and cried. Just like the time I found out that I was picked out of a dustbin. Last time, I was furious-how could my _parents _throw me away, like they would a rotten apple? Now, fuming-that bastard did not even give me a break: he practically did it in front of the school.

Stranger placed a comforting hand on my back. Oddly enough, I _did _feel comforted. Now where _was _this hand when I needed it two years ago? I bravely lifted my gaze and set it upon Stranger's face blinking repeatedly, trying to clear my vision.

It was Kira.

Biggest mistake alert: I kissed him.

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**A/N: You know you want to-click the button**


	9. A Better Ending

**A/N: Helloo! this is a record for me. Not only is this chapter 2 weeks ahead of schedule, it is 600 i repeat 600 words long (amazing right?) it's all thanks to: Cari-Akira, KaGaRi, Living Arrow, XMusicLuverX, Shadow-Naka, IYGU, Haruka Mizumi, ovp, kIrEigIrL, seiha, Co-Star, Kazumi, Kairi or Kairi-chan, Lie74, cagalliisdabomb, Suppie, The Jackle, lalala, saPphiRe.'.m0i, Skyforger, PINKSISA, FMAobsessed, Angelsorceress, IX The Melodious Nocturne I..., SacredBlade, windtear, Vigorian-Asakura, Cagallifan, Kageharu Kaco, Anyonmustilllogin. I LOVE YOU. **

**My exams are coming up in 4 weeks and will be over in 6, so please don't expect another update in 2 months. After that i promise fortnightly updates. I'm really sorry for the predicted lateness of the next chapter but my exam results are directly proportionate to my computer time. HAH. who says you can't learn math whilst reading fics. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam See (Destiny)**

**.oOo.**

Okay fine, I wasn't expecting him to start frenching me or anything but, seriously, he didn't have to shove me off the moment my lips so much as grazed his.

Thank goodness no one saw, I _hope_.

After forcefully pushing me away, he stoned for about ten seconds then clutched my wrist and lugged me to the balcony. He looked left, then right (like a 5-year-old child would before crossing the street) before saying four words that reduced me to a sobbing mess once more.

"You are my sister."

Somebody please tell me: does my heart look like a rugby ball that _wants _to be kicked around? First, Shinn dumps me, without so much as a word leaving his mouth. Then, when I'm doing my thing-being depressed, my _brother _comes to comfort me and I kiss him. Gosh, what am I, mentally retarded?

He continues talking but my head has stopped functioning. I simply stand there and nod, occasionally murmuring an _uhhuh _for no reason in particular. Then, it suddenly occurs to me that I shouldn't care whether or not Kira is my brother. Rather, I should be angry that he didn't tell me sooner _and _that while I've been living the life of an orphan; he's been living the life of the son of Orb's president.

Bastard!

"Leave me alone," I said, trying to summon as much venom as I could into the words.

He left.

My head was throbbing from all the possibilities, tears flowed from my eyes as freely as coke from the free-flow drink dispenser at _Wendy's_.

Another hand was wrapped around me. I was getting quite sick of this. Didn't I tell him to… buzz off…?

Stranger No. 2's hair was blue.

"We can't have princesses crying at proms now can we?"

For a moment I thought that it was a rhetorical question, but he left his questioning gaze on my face. So, I shook my head and closed my eyes, trying to hold back the tears.

"Well, I guess we have to fix that then."

He must have realized that my eyes were closed because after that he said, "What, am I so ugly you can't bear to see my face?"

My eyes shot open faster than you could say "I". Afraid of stuttering and chortling on my words, I just shook my head frantically and tried to plaster a smile on my face.

"Want to tell me what's up? Don't worry, I won't tell anyone." He dragged his thumb and index finger across his lips as if an invisible zip existed and smiled.

Tell me: who could resist a smile like that? So I told him everything, pausing only to sniff or to wipe the tears from my face. I was reminded of why I was in love with Athrun again.

It was spring, and the flowers of love had blossomed once again. Winter was finally over. Life was good.

He gave me a warm embrace and told me it would be fine. He held my shoulders and looked into my eyes… Just before pulling me into a kiss like no other.

What is it with guys and violence? Why can't they do things gently? Gosh, I was going to have some serious bruises on my wrists and lips tomorrow. Ouch.

Anyhow, I totally change my stand on prom. Prom is not a ridiculous gala where everyone wears gowns and dies of boredom then suffers through a _hell_ of a hangover the next day.

No, prom is a night of possibilities.

A night where princesses are created and love blossoms after a winter of stormy nights.

**Things to and not to do:**

1. Have fun

2. Fall in love with Athrun again

**.oOo.**

**A/N: So, as i was saying, unless i'm _extremely _motivated by the lovely reviews i'm sorry but you have to wait 2 months for more AxC fluff. Drop off comments, it's really helping my writing, not to mention my ego. **


	10. Humpty Dumpty

**A/N: HELLO EVERYONE! MY EXAMS ARE OVER! As promised, here's the next chapter! This would not be up so early if not for: kaurama-kasuki, Canadain-Girl, IYGU, PINKSISA, zXia0RayZz, Haruka Mizumi, The Jackle, Kathya, Vigorian-Asakura, Co-Star, ovp, SacredBlade, Athrya, saPphiRe.'.m0i, Angelsorceress, Cari-Akira, meowmeowtheblackcat, lalala, FMAobsessed, Kazumi Kairi or Kairi-chan, Skyforger, Reflection-on-Chocolate-Milk.  
**

**I hope you enjoy this one. It took me uber long. Oh yes! My second sad attempt of poetry is there. Short but sweet. Hopefully. **

**Disclaimer: ****I do not own Gundam See (Destiny)**

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And then again… that does not mean that you do not get hell the next day.

"Oh my gosh, oh my gosh. _She_ is with _Athrun_."

"I didn't think she would have the galls to two-time Shinn! And he was such a nice guy; thank goodness _Stellar_ was there to _comfort_ him."

What did she say? I two-timed Shinn?

Why, if that heart-cracker were here right now…

Just yesterday, while I was reading a book of nursery rhymes to the kids at the orphanage, I stumbled across the rhyme about humpty dumpty. Then, it occurred to me: where in the nursery rhyme does it say that humpty dumpty is an egg?

I took it for a completely different meaning. Can you guess it? Here's a pointer: It's actually the heart Shinn just broke.

See all the trouble he gave all the king's horses & all the king's men?

What a jackass.

Well, in case you did not understand that, let me clarify: "IT WAS SHINN WHO DUMPED ME FIRST"

Oh crap. I said that out loud.

And now, the laughing and taunting begins…

"Poor Shinn… The girl is living in self-denial"

"Now she's putting the blame on Shinn! What _will _she think of next?"

"What does Athrun see in _her_ anyway?"

"Yeah! No looks, no cash and no brains. Did you know her grades are below mine! And I failed _English_!"

Annoying, but they _do _talk sense. Well some sense at least.

What _does _Athrun see in me?

I spent almost the entire Literature lesson pondering over it.

Although I'm not exactly 'America's Next Top Model' material, I am quite sure I am not _that_ ugly. I mean, no, I do not go to the gym. Yes, I devour chocolates like there is no tomorrow. Yes, my face is not as soft and 'moisturized' as almost every girl in the school. But hey, that does not mean I do not have 'looks'.

…

Who am I kidding? I admit it: I do not have looks.

Fine, second point: I HAVE CASH. No, I am not referring to the black-hole of the box I call 'piggy-bank'. I am talking about all the money my _dear _father has locked away in the bank. Remember? I am the daughter of Orb's President. We are not talking 'defense minister' or some lame title like that. We are talking P-R-E-S-I-D-E-N-T. That is big shit.

Bottom line: I _do _have cash.

I just have not collected it yet.

AND! I am not stupid. I passed my most recent History test and I pass English. Always. How dare Ms Gossip compare her (lack of) intellect?

See? I do have something worthy of Athrun.

I shiver. Athrun… Contrary to popular belief, and I admit it, my belief, Athrun talks to me now-that amongst other, more interesting things.

Let me tell you: never underestimate the lip/tongue-skills of a playboy.

Ahem. Yes, where was I? Right, Athrun.

Because I was so love-struck, and the poem I found was still engraved in my mind; I found myself writing words that had a certain rhythm and sort of rhymed, at select locations.

I _know _you are simply dying to read it. Here it goes:

_'Twas you to whom my heart was bound_

_I would listen to your every sound_

_& they one day you turned around_

_Staring in your eyes, Ii felt my heart pound_

_It was only then that I found_

_'Twas I to whom your heart was bound_

Before you say it, I have no idea what is up with the "'twas".

And I have no idea what is up with Kira.

He has not come to school today, neither has Lacus.

There was an article in the newspaper about Lacus being attacked by a group of fans, last night whilst leaving prom. Supposedly she sustained no injuries but her bodyguard protecting her got pretty badly damaged.

Both Kira and Lacus left prom together, alone…

It makes one wonder.

Well, it makes me wonder.

I guess no one linked the two occasions together. I guess no one reads so much about Lacus. I guess no one was watching Kira leave prom as closely as I.

I guess no one watches Kira closely aside from me…

**Things to do:**

1. Bring breath mints-Athrun tongue is getting a bit too curious

2. Physics report on "the dangers of live wires"

3. GET GROCERIES. I swear, I _will _remember this time

4. Find out exactly what happened to Lacus mysterious "bodyguard"

**Things not to do: **

1. Write another crappy love poem

2. Act like a love-struck girl, even though I am

3. Pounce and Athrun and make out with him in front of everyone

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**A/N: HEY HEY. HOPE YOU LIKED IT.  
**

**Unimportant Message: Right now, I'm floating somewhere in between the space of seventh heaven and cloud nine. What shall we call this... Eigth paradise? HAHA. Okay, sorry about that. I'm HIGH. I just drank 2 cups of coffee so I could stay up and update and and I GOT THIRD HIGHEST IN MY CLASS FOR MATH. HAH. I feel amazing. AND NOT TO MENTION: I WROTE A POEM. which i think is not half bad. **

**Important Message: REVIEW. If you need a topic to talk about, please tell me how good/bad the poem was and how you think the overall plotline is progressing. In case you are wondering this fic will be no longer than 20 chapters. Unless i think of another plot (: **

**LOVE YAH!  
**


	11. Mr Shades

**A/N: Before you say it: I'M SORRY. AND I KNOW YOU ALL WANNA KILL ME RIGHT NOW. okay. now that's done with. lemme explain. i know i said i did really well for my math paper. but my other papers weren't too promising and so, as a result, i have FKING tuition almost everyday and my computer time is like less than 1/2 hour a day and i just got a bf and and and... although none of the above is an excuse to update 2 months late. that's my excuse. **

**anyway, better late than never yes? thank you to :Celle666, junon2, Zaton, Skyforger, x.GhOsTdArKsTaR.x, Haruka Mizumi, IYGU, zXia0RayZz, Co-Star, akidarchangelprincess, xaurama-kasuki, Haru Hotaru, Angelsorceress, sapphire.'.m0i, SacredBlade, dreaZALA, Cari-Akira, The Jackle, Kazumi Kairi or Kairi-chan, AirStriker, Kathya **

**I LOVE YOU. YOU KEEP ME GOING. ENJOY! **

* * *

I'm starting to do some serious linking. Just like Mr. Fllaga says: things get clearer when you link them up. He also says that Ms Murrue is hot, but we can't discredit him just based on bad taste. 

Anyway, back to the linking. Lacus came to school today. Kira did not. I overheard, not eavesdropped mind you, Lacus telling our principal that Kira was not coming to school because he was in the hospital. Injured or simply ill, left for me to speculate.

Lacus was accompanied by a fierce looking kid who followed her around like a dog on a leash. I swear, he wore so much black and had such a forgettable face if he wore sunglasses he would fit the profile of a bouncer perfectly. Except that I was pretty sure he was a bodyguard.

This extended line of thinking and a pinch of stalking (only a pinch, I swear) eventually led me to conclude three main things:

1. Kira got injured and was in the hospital

2. Kira used to be Lacus' bodyguard

3. Lacus' new bodyguard loves strawberries

What? I didn't say they were relevant conclusions.

Speaking of relevance, I am going to talk about something just as important but completely irrelevant.

It just occurred to me that Athrun and I do not talk per se. Athrun and I tend to spend our time on more _productive _and _adventurous _ventures, which I will not expound due to certain sensitivities. Let me just tell you, his fingers are freaking nimble.

Thinking of this, I tried to start a conversation, I really did! But I must say it is darn distracting when you have a curious mouth and hands exploring your form. But I did manage to find out that he likes green, or was it wearing jeans? Whatever. It seemed that despite his charisma he did not talk much at all.

On the contrary, he was a great listener. He could sit and listen to me talk about just about anything and yet he would never fall asleep or forget a thing I said. He is either really good at lying or he is just perfect. I hope for the latter. I _really_ hope for the latter.

Because if not, I can never be sure if he ever liked me.

Trust. It took me a while. I was afraid. Afraid that he would leave me alone just like my parents did. Leave me to be invisible.

Alone, if only.

Tell me again why I baby-sit? I mean it _is_ only the lowest paying job with the lousiest privileges that include having a kid attached to your leg and a baby's screams test your patience.

If only Mayu were here. Now she was one amazing kid, practically the only kid I could live with. She was quiet and she had this quiet aura. You could hear the freaking silence when she was around AND she baby-sat.

She _was _only ten, but she was one hell of a baby-sitter. And also one hell of a sneak. That is why, with a tiny investment in a chocolate bar and a dash of persuasiveness, I now have the name of the hospital Kira is staying in and his room number.

So here I am, with a box of my homemade cookies (which do not really look like, or smell like, or even remotely taste like cookies, but cookies all the same) a few doors away from Kira's room and what do I see? Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it is not Superman. It is a troop of Supermans, in black. They look like clones of the guy who was shadowing Lacus this morning, but this troop had sunglasses.

Black suits, check. 007 briefcases, check. Well-built chests, check. Sunglasses, check. Dangerous-looking lump behind their backs, check. I rest my case-they are so totally bodyguards.

But wait a minute (or two), a troop of bodyguards outside a bodyguard's room? Man, they really take hospital visits to the extreme. And what do I see there? No flowers?

There was definitely something more to this than meets the eye, than meets my eye.

And I swear, I would have gotten to the bottom of it if one of the clones did not just give me the evil eye.

Maybe I will do the detective thing tomorrow.

With Athrun of course. And Heine, I hear he has been working out. And Shiho, she does pack a nasty punch. Maybe I should just bring a tank.

Yeah…

I'll do the detecting work in my tank with Athrun, Heine and Shiho fighting alongside me.

The raging lunatic inside me thinks 'Aw, what the heck'.

And I barge through the troop to open the door, beginning the end of my life as I know it.

**Things to do:**

1. Live

2. Find out what is up with Murrue and Mr Fllaga

3. Solve my mini-mystery

4. Never, ever get tricked into baby-sitting duty. EVER

**Things not to do: **

1. Get killed by a troop of men in black

2. Baby-sit

3. History homework

4. Be short

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**A/N: well i hope you liked it! i'm adding more AxC fluff in the next chapter. heh. don't expect any plot developments in the next one. the next chapter is simple, plain fluff (:**


	12. Whoops! My Bad

**A/N: I know everyone thought i was dead. Sorry to disappoint you but i'm still alive and breathing. In a sad attempt to make it up to all of you, for updating, hm... lets see, 5 months late? i wrote a really really REALLY LONG chap. it's 2000++ words. aren't you all proud of me? (: Well, just wanna say a HUGE THANK YOU to KaGaRi, ButaLove, Heather, naru-chan1, Angelsorceress, neji447, lalala, saPphiRe.'.m0i, kaurama-kasuki, ' '-BLaCKLIsTeD 27-' ', SacredBlade, Mrs. Radcliffe13, dreaZALA, Cari-Akira, The Jackle, Kazumi Kairi or Kari-chan, akidarchangelprincess, Minerva's Cradle, Kathya, junon2.**

**If not for you guys/girls i would have given up on this story halfway just because, it's a totally me thing to do. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Seed (Destiny) haha. i just realised i hardly put disclaimers. oh wells. **

**Enjoy!**

* * *

I expected the unexpected. But once I expected it, then (logically) it was 'expected' and so I was never really prepared for the scene in front of me: 

A flustered Lacus: with a sleeve (clearly made to rest on her shoulder) very much _off_ her shoulder, on top of a Kira whose hands were in a NC16 region. I avert my eyes instinctively. Lacus jolts out of her suggestive, bordering erotic angle, in attempt to break free. I guess it was just their luck that her skirt was caught in between Kira, the bed and the railing beside the bed. Kira tries his best to free her but let's just say, it was quite a tangle. The couple struggling, on the bed, Kira with lipstick stain on his face, Lacus with her shirt not quite on her, looked… Amusing. I couldn't help myself-I laughed. Lacus really should stop using lipstick when she is planning to have an intense make-out session with Kira. It really does give them away so easily.

I hear a stampede of boots behind me.

They always say you never know when you are going to die. Funny, is it not? I not only _know _I am going to die, I _see, hear _and, thanks to an entire day in suits, out in the scorching sun, _smell _my death-a troop of Men In Black. My perception of Will Smith in black suits and sunglasses will never be the same again.

If there ever is an 'again', that is.

Funny; how I cannot stop laughing at Kira and Lacus. Now is probably the closest thing I am going to get to a deathbed and I cannot stop laughing.

My birth was already screwed; obviously fate would only allow my death to be even worse.

I brace myself to be dragged out of the room.

I really should have brought the tank...

"Stop that at once," a stern voice threatens.

Correction: a tank and a bazooka.

I try my best to chortle down my laughs. I must admit, my best, is not very good. Amazing how much tension four simple words a 5-year old child would be able to utter can create.

I am so dead. How I wish I believe in some random god so I could do something like pray. That is what they do right? I mean, if you are scared, and you believe in a god, you pray. Apparently it helps.

I decide to pray. But I do not know how.

Well, if you do not know any prayers, just make some up.

I start murmuring random words like "save me, save me, save me" under my breath. Hopefully, that resembled a prayer. The phrase slowly turns to a mantra and soon, I get myself to believe that someone will actually come to save me.

That is when I find that the scary voice was not talking to me.

"Yes sir!" a frazzled Kira answers as he, thankfully, manages to release Lacus from her temporary captivity on a hospital bed.

Not exactly what I would call a 'rescue', but I am not that picky. A delay in my death works for me.

"Kira Yamato, care to explain _why_ your _friend _was _on_ you?"

Suddenly it hits me.

Why am I so scared?

I am the freaking daughter of Orb's president, practically the heir to the throne; and I am cowering in the middle of the room because there is a troop of bodyguards (inclusive of one with an exceptionally scary voice) who were hired to take care of the _son _of _Orb's president._ I should not be scared. If they knew of my identity, they would probably _protect _me, lest _attack _me.

Besides, the bodyguard with the scary voice was not talking to me.

Encouraged by this sudden realization I straighten my shoulders (you have to look presentable if you are the president's daughter) and turn my head, ready to introduce myself as Cagalli Yamato.

I see a man. This man is strange. This man-is not wearing black. My guess was the stern voice belonged to him.

Hair: as golden as rice ready for harvest. Eyes: a deep shade of violet. Face: an older replica of Kira's.

That was the face of… dare I say it?

My father.

Out loud, though, I said "You are the bloody bastard who chucked me in the dustbin. Screw all these bodyguards; I am going to kill you."

My eyes must have shot more than just daggers because the _bastard_ looked genuinely scared, or could he have been thinking? Being the nice person I am, I left him a couple of seconds to collect a response.

I certainly was not extended the same courtesy. Guys could be so impolite these days, whatever happened to being a gentleman? In an instant, as if an invisible 'on' button had been pressed, all the MIBs/007s whatever you want to call them, produced guns (from only David Copperfield knows where) and pointed them at little old me. I seemed to be getting a lot of attention these days and for some strange reason, I loved it.

It made me feel like I mattered. It made me feel like I was worth someone's attention. It made me feel like I was more than trash. Even if, it was not most preferable the sort of attention.

Apparently, the _bastard _didn't think so umpteen years ago.

Oh well, his loss.

He will be the one who does not matter this time. He will be the one who is not worth a fly's attention. He will be trash (and trashed) this time.

That was what I set out to make him anyway; tiny problem: it is not the easiest thing to make a nations' president redundant.

I looked at the barrels of all the guns; shiny, not to mention all directed at me. I do pity the cleaner who will have to clean up the blood on the floor later. Bloodstains _are _so tough to get rid of.

Good luck, or is it goodbye, to me.

In attempt to distract myself from my eminent death, in a hospital no less, I lift my gaze and give a challenging look to the _bastard_. I see disbelief change to confusion, flickers of recognition threaten to extinguish, and all of a sudden, a flame is lit.

"Cagalli?" his voice does not sound so stern anymore. It actually sounds, no, it can it be, caring?

He runs to me, grabs me by the shoulder, looks into my eyes, extinguishes the anger in my eyes, my heart, my soul, simultaneously and subconsciously deactivating the "take-out-your-guns-and-point-at-the-pretty-blonde-in-the-middle-of-the-room" button.

"Cagalli," he confirms, talking more to himself than to me.

He hugs me.

Then, all hell breaks lose.

The demon fights to escape from the rein bound so tightly around its neck. Strangling. The rein, stitched together over years of denial, hiding behind the façade of anger.

Tears wrestle its way out my eyes.

Minute teardrops, I hear them-drip, drip on the marble floor.

…

Flowing freely now.

The rein has worn out, no more disguises.

It did not matter now that he was the _bastard _who chucked me in a bin. All that mattered was that someone cares about me. Not because of how I looked, or because of my (bubbly) personality. Someone simply cares. Someone loves me, just for being me.

How long has it been? How long has it been since that day?

The last time I cried. Prom night I cried out of anger. The last time I cried of sadness…

How long has it been?

No one was there to give me that hug I so badly needed.

No one...

Now, I got my hug, I got my father. Is it 2 years too late? Or right on time?

The tears, somehow seem to take it all away-all the pain I thought I had long buried under the earth, all the misery I assumed I had gotten used to and all the derision that seemed to fall on my back like water on wax.

Questions float in my head-too disorganized to count as thoughts.

Truth and I, face to face.

We finally meet.

"Why?"

One word, infinite possibilities.

I heard my voice crack under the strain. By my count, I had been bawling for at _least _5 minutes. No fun, no fun at all.

"It is a long story."

"I want, no, I _need _to know."

So he told me.

My mother was a spy, a spy working for and enemy of my father's. She gave birth to Kira and me. My father did not know at the time.

She had a plan to kidnap us and hold us hostage, to force my father's hand and make Orb join the Alliance.

We were only 3 months old then.

Fortunately, the Secret Services of Orb had uncovered her plot, albeit after she just left the manor. A wild goose chase ensued. She ran off, carrying Kira and me in her arms. It eventually ended up in her being caught. Secret Service managed to find a crying, hungry Kira dumped in a bush, but they did not find me. Even after an exceptionally rough interrogation, my _mother_ refused to disclose where she had dumped me.

No news was allowed to be printed because my father did not want the people to know that security had been compromised.

Over the years, Secret Service has continued to look for me, but to no avail.

Until a year ago.

They were going through record of orphanages and found me, a blonde who had a striking resemblance to Kira.

It turns out that they could not find me originally because another lady had taken me in, unofficially, of course. Struck by pity she found me where my mother of all people had unceremoniously dumped me. According to the _all-knowing _Secret Services' data, she cared for me for 2 years. After which she dumped me in a bin. Why? The _all knowing _Secret Service do not know.

My phone rang. Yes, talk about anticlimax.

Athrun.

"It is okay. Take the call; anyway, I am extremely late for a meeting. I will get into contact with you as soon as the opportunity arises. It has been nice to meet you Cagalli."

Just like that, my father left. Hopefully, not for good.

I pressed the little green button.

"Hello?"  
"Cags, can you come to musical fountain at the park? I need..." His voice faded. I heard a sniff, a cough, a clearing of the throat and then, "Please?"

I know I am not the best at reading people, but _usually_, just usually, when you hear a sniff and the person is not sick, the person is crying. Sue me if I am mistaken.

"On my way, give me 5 minutes. Bye!"

I did not wait for a response. I rushed my goodbyes to Kira and Lacus and just before closing the door told them to remember to lock the door this time, winked then dashed out of the room.

So, I knew two things. Athrun was crying and he was in the park.

I was going there, obviously to cheer him up. Following a line of logic, which I thought was really scientific of me; I concluded that Athrun just wanted someone to make out with. I cursed silently. Was that all I was? A make out toy without make up?

No; at least, not this time, I decided.

I went into the nearest 7-eleven near the hospital and got a bar of 'Hershey's-cookies and cream' using the last bits of my pocket money for the month, just before sprinting across the road to the park just outside the hospital. Sometimes it was good living in such a small country like Orb.

I made it there, breathless but in under 10 minutes. Athrun should know that 5 minutes me-time meant 15 minutes in the real world. In other words, I was early. But he was nowhere in sight.

"Cags!" a voice called, from the sky? Superman?

I looked up and saw a blue head in a tree ducked behind the trunk.

What could I do? Drag him down? Sadly I did not have Michael Jordon's height, so I climbed the tree.

Yes, they do not call me "boy" for nothing. With more effort put in, in trying to not drop/break the chocolate than the actual climbing of the tree, I made my way up the tree, only to be shocked out of whatever wits I had left after the numbing encounter with my father.

I saw tears, real tears, on Athruns' perfect face. I guess he must have seen through my crystal clear head and found my disbelief.

He tried to explain, "I-My father- he-"

I put my _fingers, _unbearably difficult not to just kiss him there and then, on his lips and hushed him.

He looked into my eyes.

I guess he saw comfort, since he smiled. A tiny one but a smile, nonetheless.

I smiled back, then gently placed his heavy head on my chest, _not _my boobs, and patted his head.

At first, he had no reaction and I thought that I had read the signs all-wrong. Just as I was about to lift his head, he burst into sobs and thrust his chiseled arms around my frame.

"It's okay. I'm here," I told him as my fingers combed through his midnight blue hair. "And I brought chocolate," I said, presenting a bar of 'Hershey's'. I with my free hand I managed to tear open the packet and I broke off a piece and put, cum stuffed, it into his mouth.

"Chocolate makes everything better," I explained.

He sniffed, wiped his tears away then gave a wide grin. It looked fake to me.

"Thank you." And then he crushed his lips onto mine and pushed me against the rough bark of the tree. Thank heavens it was a big tree with big branches to sit and make out on.

He pried open my mouth with his chocolate-flavored tongue. I submitted and let him explore every inch of me. Usually, I would hold back, not today. It just so happened that today, he was my favourite flavor-'Cookies-cookies and cream'.

His hands grew more desperate, his tongue more probing. I felt his crazed desire pressing against me.

I broke off the kiss.

"No"

Breathless, panting.

"What did I do?" His hand still dancing across my spine.

"I am not your make-out toy."

"Whoever said you were?"

"You are doing this to overcome your grief. I am not going to let you. Tell me what the problem is. I will fix it, then, you can relieve yourself," I finished, brushing off my last few words.

"Can't." His hand froze over the arch of my back.

"Why?" it seemed that was my favourite question of the day. I place a hand on his forearm, "you can. You don't have to hide from me."

He told me, I listened.

He gave me his torn, paper heart to hold, to take the weight off his shoulders. I took his heart and mended slowly, words caressing and weaving the broken pieces back together again. Granting him confidence, repairing his soul, helping him find relief.

I returned his heart to him whole, undamaged, untouched. Forgiven, accepted, and loved.

Unlike with all the others where he snatched it back instantly, he did not lock it up back into the safe (with a seven-digit code) in his chest. For the first time, he did not want his heart back.

"For safekeeping"

He gave me his whole heart.

"For you to heal"

I gave him mine.

Two tainted hearts are infinitely better than one. At least with two, there is hope of them being mended.

Under the moonlight, lovers found their hearts.

**Things to do:**

1. Pluck flowers from the Orphanage's Garden for Kira

2. Find out what the difference is between reducing sugars and non-reducing sugars, of fail Bio

3. Call my _father _(the word still sounds funny coming from my mouth)

**Things not to do:**

1. Fall of the darn tree

2. Barge into a room guarded by a horde of bodyguards

3. See Kira and Lacus making out

4. Get home after curfew, which, whoops, was an hour ago.

* * *

**A/N: hate me? love me? tell me anyway (: REVIEWS PLEASE!**


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